Breakfast Pizza

Oh, food trends. You hipster fuck bastards. It’s as though my world has been enveloped in Breakfast Pizza. It’s in my Instagram feed, my Pinterest feed, peeps at the office are bringing it in from QT. Oy. Fine. FINE. We’ll give this mofo a try.

Twenty googled recipes later, I found a good poolish pizza dough recipe and prepped that before I went to bed.

Then, this morning when I got up, I finished the dough and waited the requisite hour by making coffee, slicing some veg, and catching up on social media.

This was easy, and cooked relatively fast (well, in a 500* oven, anything would, right?). Himself liked it, although after his first bite the first words out of his mouth were, “don’t make this often.” This translates to way-too-yummy-bread-is-not-good-for-him, btw.

I topped mine with what was on hand – some olive oil, parmesan, onions, tomatoes and artichoke hearts plus the eggs, of course. Then a drizzle of pesto on the plate. I was confounded by the variety of cook times for the eggs in my googling. They varied from 8 minutes to 15. That’s a bit much. So I started at 8 and went up from there. I made one thick crust and one thin. I preferred the thick crust, and Himself preferred the thin. Dat ist normal in our house.

Observational notes – final cook time in a 500* convection oven was 12 minutes. The eggs were cold from the fridge. The ones on the thin crust were perfectly medium, the ones on the thick crust were just past sunny side up for the whites, and medium for the yolks. (What the hell, thermodynamics? I need to research THAT.) I would totally make this again – it was a fun treat. I bet it would be delicious on the grill for an al fresco brekkie, actually. Maybe next time – it would be perfect in the summer, when the mornings are still cool and you don’t want a 500* oven on in the house. (And if you’ve never baked pizza on the grill, google that shit immediately.)
Alright – you ready?

The Crust
The night before, stir together in your Kitchenaid mixer bowl:
3.5 oz flour
3.5 oz water
¼ tsp. yeast
Cover with some wax paper or a tea towel and go to bed.

In the morning, add to the bowl:
9 oz flour
4 oz warm water
1 tsp. yeast
1 ¼ tsp. salt
Mix with the dough hook about five or so minutes. It will be sticky, but still pull away from the edges of the bowl.
Divide the dough in to four balls, rub them with some olive oil, cover them with some wax paper and leave in warm place for an hour. After half an hour, heat up your oven and choose your toppings.

The Toppings
4 Campari tomatoes in ¼” slices
8 quarter artichoke hearts
10 zucchini ribbons (run a veg peeler down the length of a washed zucchini)
Two to three 1/8″ slices sweet onion, separated in to rings
4 tsp. virgin olive oil
1 tsp. Italian herbs
¼ c. parmesan cheese
4 large eggs
Plus, get out your baking sheet and sprinkle it with enough corn meal to coat the bottom, about a ¼ cup. This is the non-stick surface for your ‘za.
When the hour was up for the dough, I put two balls in the fridge to make pizzas for dinner. For the other two, I rolled them out – thick crust 7” circle (or, in my case, amorphous blob shape), thin 10”.
Place the crust on the cornmeal surface. Drizzle with half the olive oil, the Italian herbs and half the parmesan. Arrange the veg – the only rule is to make sure they form a egg-proof perimeter around the edges. Crack on your eggs, sprinkle with the remaining cheese and drizzle with the remaining olive oil and carefully slide in to the oven. Halfway through (about 6 minutes), rotate your tray(s).
It’s done when the egg is how you like it. For medium, it was 12 minutes in our oven with eggs cold from the fridge.

Bon apétit. Serve as is, or with a drizzle of pesto. Ha! Although I forgot to take a pic with the pesto, so it’s imagine what it would look like time. Sigh. Anywho, make some and enjoy.

Vanilla Strawberry Jam…..and orange scones

It’s almost spring, kind of a pre-spring really. I say this because Sprouts had quarts of strawbabies for 97 cents, and I was all over that. But…..although they were red, they were not really flavorful or sweet. So, what to do with a ton of non-optimal berries?

Then I remembered this awesome book I checked out from the library about small-batch canning, Food in Jars. I’d checked it out to read while planning a fig-onion-jam-making party, only it’s winter and the onions are all shite and not yet worthy of jam making. That mother is still totally happening, but once the onions are fat and sweet and not stringy and hot. But I digress. So, strawberry jam was now on the agenda. Last time I made it, I added some vanilla and it was awesome. So, there we go – I now had a plan.

I did this granny-style, 1:1 by weight fruit to sugar. Plus a 3″ piece of already scraped vanilla pod.

It is really yummy, but quite sweet. And a little heavy on the vanilla (I guess I was expecting a miracle and the cooking to make the berries have more berry-ness?). This is the kind of jam for crostatas, or afternoon tea, or sandwiched in a white layer cake. We had it with some orange scones (the usual recipe, with the zest of half an orange added, and just a little egg wash and sparkle sugar on top.)

This was a fun Friday morning off project, only took a couple of hours. If you’ve never canned before, I can highly recommend Marisa McClellan’s book, or The Spruce has a great visual beginner’s guide. It’s not hard, but there are some safety bits that are essential.

Ok – Here’s the recipe for Vanilla Strawberry Jammy Jams

Ingredients:
2 pounds fresh strawberries; washed, stemmed, cut in half
2 pounds sugar
3″ piece of vanilla bean pod that’s already had its seeds scraped out. (or a one-inch piece of whole pod)

In a big stock pot on a very low flame, mix the berries and sugar. Use a potato masher to smoosh it up. Toss in the vanilla bean pod. Check on it and stir it every ten minutes or so at the beginning to make sure the sugar isn’t burning. Once it’s liquidy, let it barely bubble away for about two hours, then start to stir it every 15 minutes or so, again to make sure the bottom doesn’t scorch. When it sheets on a spoon, it’s ready (What the hell does that mean? Read on, baby!) At that point you can can it in a water bath, or put it in to freezer jam jars. Or just refrigerator jars. With all that sugar, it’ll stay good for quite a long while. Take some to the neighbors – mine loved it!

I’ll post about those scones later; I tried a Nigella trick and tossed the dough in the freezer for 20 minutes before cutting the dough. THAT was amazeballs and I am definitely doing THAT again.

Ok, go make some jam. It’s easy.

Snausages! (Spicy Turkey Breakfast Bites)

Oh, my goodness. The twelve year old inside me cannot stop giggling at calling something bites. (It’s a French thing, you’ll have to google it.) But! Saw this idea while scouring the Pinterest for low carb breakfast ideas other than eggs.

I’ll give this a good grade – it’s yummy. Ground turkey mixed with some grated butternut squash and onion for moisture and flavor, with some fresh rosemary, sage and red pepper flakes to add spice. I am actually looking forward to mornings this week for the first time in a while.

Spicy Turkey Breakfast Bites
(Can we call it sausage? I don’t know if we can….but that’s the idea.)

1 lb. 85% lean ground turkey
1/2 c. grated white onion
1/2 c. grated butternut squash (or zucchini)
1 Tbsp. AP flour
1.5 Tbps. dried sage (leaves, not powder)
1.5 Tbsp. minced fresh rosemary
1 tsp. crushed red pepper

Preheat your oven to 400″. Line a baking sheet with silver foil and spritz with baking spray.
In a medium bowl, mix together everything but the turkey, then add in the turkey and mix well. I use clean hands, but use a paddle attachment in your mixer if you need to. Make twelve meatballs out of the mix, about the size of a golf ball. This is really sticky, btw, so just be mentally prepared. Then, wet your hand or the bottom of a glass and smoosh the balls down so they’re about 1/2″ thick and look like slider patties. Bake 20 minutes, turn, bake 10-15 more minutes. If they didn’t get brown enough, broil for 2-3 minutes. (Don’t bake much longer because you don’t want dry little hockey pucks.)

And, are you asking yourself why there’s a tablespoon of flour in there? It’s a back-up sponge; the ground turkey, grated onion and squash have a LOT of water between them. A little dash of starch (like bread crumbs in your meatloaf) keeps the moisture in the meat instead of running out the sides. I think. Since, you know, this is theoretical as I am not a food scientist.

Cool, and serve for brekkie. We had ours with an oven frittata, although a three-pack of these would be a great breakfast on their own.

The next time I make these, I am adding chopped spinach. Just for the added color and nutrients.

servings: 12

According to the verywell.com recipe nutrition analyzer, each patty has:
Cal 89
Fat 5.8g
Sodium 24mg
Carbs 1.9
Protein 7g

Ham & Green Chile Breakfast Bake


We’ve been getting a little nuts on the sugar thing (snort. we. you guys totally know who is to blame for this.), so we’re hopping on the no sugar bandwagon for a little bit to get that back in line. That means a fast and already prepared hearty breakfast (mainly so I don’t get a green chile bacon burrito in the Blake’s drive-thru every single day), and we love our little oven omelettes over here.

My obsession with Hatch green chile continues, so they’re the flavor in this iteration. Instead of the little silicone baking cups, I went with a square pan to slice in to servings. Honestly, those little cups are a pain in the ass to clean – and I can’t put them in the dishwasher because it’s like the soap never really comes off them or something. Ok, I digress. Breakfast, bitches!! And a serving comes in at 141 calories and 11 grams of protein. That is what my blood sugar calls a WIN.

Ham Green Chile Breakfast Bake
1.5c. diced ½” thick ham slab
10 eggs
1 c. mushrooms, sliced
1 c. hatch green chili
1 Tbsp. olive oil
½ medium white onion, diced
4 c. fresh baby spinach (or 1 c. frozen chopped, thawed and drained)
S&P
Dash pecorino cheese

Preheat your oven to 325*, and grease an 8” square cake pan. Spread out the diced ham in the bottom of the pan.
In a medium skillet over medium heat, add half the olive oil and mushrooms with a little S&P and saute the mushrooms until they are slightly golden and have shrunk by about a quarter. Spread them over the ham in the pan. Next spread the green chili over the ham and shrooms.
Put the other half of the olive oil in the skillet and add the onion, season with S&P. Saute until they are mostly translucent and maybe a little brown on the edged. Toss the chopped fresh spinach on top, season w/ S&P, put on the lid and remove from the heat. This will wilt the spinach.
While that’s doing it’s thang, crack the ten eggs in to a medium bowl and whisk them with a little salt and pepper. Stir the spinach and onion to combine, and spread over the mixture in the square pan. Gently pour the eggs over everything, and smoosh down any floaty bits that pop up. Dash the top with a little cheese. Bake about 35-40-ish minutes until golden and puffy. It should not jiggle when you shake it, and a tester will come out clean. Cool. Slice. Serve at room temp or put into individual servings to eat during the week. My plan is to serve this with those little turkey sausage patties. If that works, we’ll have that recipe in a couple weeks!

Servings: 9
According to the verywell.com recipe nutrition analyzer, each serving has:
Cal 141
Fat 8.8g
Sodium 494 mg
Carbs 4.4g (sugars 1.7g)
Protein 11.1g
AND!
226% of your vitamin D, or
Vit D 45mcg
Calcium 60mg
Iron 2mg
Potassium 238mg